Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Hilloween 3.... Tales from the crypt!!!

Once upon a time in an imaginary world where there are drinking fountains on every street corner, Footpaths are wide and vast enough for us all to co-exist and weave our paths through life like the Matting of our ancestors spirits…….. Wake up!!! You're dreaming!!!!

In the savage gothic wastelands of the doldrums of the Dark and deadly Dunedin. Pits of fire await you all around so you must ride your stunt wood into the night and fear no one and nothing but terrifying fun. They must be Vampyres!!! A ghoulish band trio perch like buzzards over the edge of the bowl, their eyes like beaks overhang the Bowl looking for a shred of meat. And the shreds of meat began to be extracted from the coping of the bowl. GG Allin was there in ghost zombie form, he was missing an arm but still flaring airiations (new word meaning air variations.) The Dark Lord Trash arrived in signature trench coat, machete up each sleeve and throwing them into his rock n' rolls, and with Backside Disasters sliding down razor blades into alcohol baths. Shotgun blasts started a race between a giant Alphalpha and a 1970's John Walker as they battled time crime laps around the scum bucket. The train station clock tower cast a dark and chilling shadow over the park as bats kissed and bit the sky turning it blood red. The sounds of guitars, cats dying and the howls of wolves were heard as the famous mexican sorcerer and conjuror of hawaiian shirts began to make the concrete quake to their foundations and Hammer Bloody tranny-furr to the bowl flats. There was a bearded vagabond who was destroying the bowl, I asked someone in the coffin next to me why he was so remorseless? They replied that he was the heartless one, as someone had apparently Nicked it;) The Ghostrider collected lost souls around the bowl and ground them into a paste that haunts the coping forever more, The 27 degree heat was baking his head to the point that it burst into flames that licked the faces of passers by. The Evil Twins from the Wanaka mountain caves tricked and terrified everyone into confusion, slapping horsey peasants lumpy heads with kicktails while emitting tar from their eyeballs. Nasty Niwa was in ka-Hoots with a spear throwing ripper and reverted back to the wisdoms of useless wooden toys days. The new paintwork on the bowl began to melt and bubble, cracks opened up and graffiti characters by Devos and Keios broke through from the underworld while the people feasted on cursed pizza's made of fire and brimstone straight from HELL. After the prizes were awarded to the deserving ones and a plan was devised for some hill murdering we went forth, with some indecision due to the rain that had started to fall, we picked our balls up and took on the greasy wet roads. With a little bit of carnage and collision, facing the werewolf on london street, The Viddler OnThe Roof got loose! No major injuries except one, a run over snapped board (my Hosoi ):tear:( RIP) then, with the rain putting a damper on the end section of our night, everyone went on into the night in their own ghoulish fashion. I feel the urge to bomb hills still now! But it's still wet out. We will have our hill fun..... maybe next week, i'll keep you posted!!!!! Special thanks go out to: Hell Pizza, Bones Wheels, Creature Skateboards, Anti Hero Skateboards, Trash Skates, Endless Line Productions, Quest Dunedin, Ligga's Lemonaids, Dean from Hirequip, The Scarers and Kylie, Igor, Simon Clayton, Craig Strong, Devos, Sylvia, Hans, Emily Cannan Morph, all the people that came along and anyone else i missed. Look forward to more madness and mayhem next year! Until then my fiends…..

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